Hal Cruttenden UK Tour comes to Wareham!
Live at The Purbeck School, Wareham
First, we brought you the 80s neon of Toyah. Then, we brought you the railway-loving wisdom of Michael Portillo. Now, we’re bringing you a man who is legally obligated to complain about things for 90 minutes.
Wareham, prepare your eardrums: Hal Cruttenden is coming to town.
🎤 About the Show: A Middle-Aged Masterclass in Grumpiness
In his brand-new tour, “Can Dish It Out But Can’t Take It,” Hal is tackling the truly big issues. You know, the important stuff:
Why middle-aged dating is a nightmare.
Why social media is a digital circus he didn’t sign up for.
Why he’s incredibly good at judging everyone else, but suffers a minor emotional collapse if someone critiques his choice of socks.
Expect high-energy rants, posh indignation, and the kind of “hard-hitting humor” that Hal tells himself he’s famous for.
Reminded me of how much I love stand-up
The comedy gift that keeps on giving
📺 "Wait, Is That The Guy From...?"
Yes. Yes, it is. If you’ve turned on a TV in the last decade, you’ve probably seen Hal’s face. He’s a veteran of:
Live at the Apollo (3 times – he’s basically part of the furniture).
Mock the Week & Have I Got News For You (where he says the smart things).
The Royal Variety Performance (where he stays on his best behavior).
Bake Off: Extra Slice (where he looks at cakes he isn’t allowed to eat).
He’s also the star of his own Radio 4 sitcom, and has four specials on Amazon Prime if you want to “try before you buy” (spoiler: you’ll want to buy).
🎟️ Don’t Miss This Night of Big Laughter in Wareham
This is set to be one of our biggest comedy events yet—and if Hal’s previous tours are anything to go by, tickets won’t stick around for long.
Join us at the Purbeck School for an unforgettable night of smart comedy, joyful chaos and full-volume laughs.
Limited Time Discount: Save 25% on your ticket costs
We’ve put our tickets on sale until the 15th March! Book tickets now to secure your discount.
Joining Hal Cruttenden on the night is Kuan-wen Huang, an award-nominated comedian, writer and actor described by Chortle as a “Taiwanese force of nature.”
Originally from Taiwan and now London-based, Kuan-wen has appeared on Comedy Central, BBC Radio 4 and Channel 4, with his debut show Ilha Formosa earning a spot in The Guardian’s Top 10 Jokes of the Edinburgh Fringe and selling out at Soho Theatre before touring across Europe.
A Sean Lock Award nominee and Leicester Comedy Festival Best Show nominee, his sharp, internationally-minded comedy has taken him to major festivals across Europe, including Kilkenny Cat Laughs and Sziget. A regular host for LGBTQ+ comedy events, Kuan-wen brings a unique global perspective, razor-sharp wit and huge stage presence — making him the perfect support act for this unmissable night of stand-up.
Ticket Types
| Ticket Tier | Seats | Perks |
|---|---|---|
| VIP Tickets | The first 20 seats, closest to the stage | Best view of the stage. |
| Premium Tickets | Seats 21–200, immediately behind VIP | Fantastic view and excellent line of sight |
| Standard Tickets | All remaining seats, seats 201-360 | None |
